Let's Get Physical, Physical

OK, I have to share some of the weird things I've seen in the gym lately. I've been meaning to write this for a while, but what I saw last night pushed it all to the forefront.

I bought a week pass to the LA Fitness down the street in Evanston for my stay this week. Seem like normal people. A few weird things, like the guy on the treadmill who was galloping sideways. Maybe he's a boxer? So last night, I packed up my gym back, grabbed dinner, then headed in to get a workout in before collapsing for the day. I change, hop on the treadmill for 40 minutes, nothing too exciting. I grab my bag, head back into the locker room, bundle up and turn the corner to walk out. And that's when I saw it. A butt. It wasn't just a woman changing. It was what I can only assume to be a weight lifter, with big shoulder, ponytail, headband, black high tops and a black thong leotard. I cannot for the life of me figure out where her pants went, especially since she was still wearing shoes. And it wasn't just a butt. It was all dimply and slightly over medium sized. Not that mine's any better, but I don't wander around the locker room fully clothed except my thonged behind. I almost gasped out loud.

At my gym in Carlsbad, there's a cardio weight lifting class I try to get to a few times a week. There's one woman who's usually there who thinks it's still 1983. She shows up without fail wearing a leotard, tshirt with the neck cut away, spandex shorts, flowing coolotty shorts over top, huge bangs, a sweatband with her pony, and high tops. Doesn't she look around?

Then there's the anorexic woman in the back of the room. She drives me nuts when we squat. First, she wears spandex shorts and a sports bra - and that's it - every class. And she's probably at least 50. We start the class with five minutes of squats with weights on a bar on your shoulders. Ouch. And we all know the proper way to squat - knees over toes, don't go below a 90 degree angle, yada yada. She skips the weight bar entirely. And then she does this almost-plie squats (turned out ballet style). And she drops her butt so that it's inches from the floor so quickly it's like she's in the Drop it Like It's Hot video. And the she pops back up. And all I can think is 1) you're not getting any kind of work out and 2) her knees!

And lastly, I have to comment on the workout thong. What is up with that?! I'm cool with the thong movement. No big deal when I'm sitting in my office chair all day. But at the gym when I'm hopping all over the place, I need something that's going to stay in its proper place - low on my thighs granny panty style.